Parables

Submitted by mike on Mon, 2007-10-22 18:27.

October is definitely the month of the Gospel of Luke. Two parables in particular - the Parable of the Lost Sheep and the Parable of the Prodigal Son. The Parable of the Lost Coin makes the trinity so I am keeping my coins close to my chest.

First the lost sheep - the sheep have seen that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, or in this case they saw that the Loopy Kale was greener and the breaches were burst - tell tale signs were brown wool under fences and over fences and the slowly munching forms in the Kale. Whilst trying to get them back I managed to let the highland cow out, it is partial to kale too. The farmers patience was wearing thin so it was time to refence the boundaries - contractors arrived and the obvious thing was to move the livestock to a field just 100 metres down the road.

It took 3 minutes to move the horse. It took 5 minutes to move the highland cow (it ran past the gate and had to get chased back). it took 90 minutes, 8 people and 2 sheep dogs to move 17 sheep (and we managed to lose one in the process and at one point had one sheep in my field 2 in the field they were supposed to be, 3 in my garden and the rest were wandering around the farmers garden). The shepherd was picking them up one at a time and carrying them. That seemed to be far more effective than flocking them (why are they called shepherds? when they are really sheep flockers - ah I see now!). The Parable of the Lost Sheep deals with a shepherd loving the one missing sheep more than the 99 others in his flock, a bit of a suspect tale in these times. In any case I managed to figuratively lose the 99 and only had the 1 left in the field - the sentinel sheep.

The fencers were a trifle naive where soay sheep are concerned and left gaps under the fence which we filled in with rocks. I note that the sheep mark their exits with their wool and focus on these areas in the future bending wire.

Returning the sheep to the field was almost a mirror of the problems except they were now in two fields down the road and we had Max the teddy bear carrying dog who went worrying them (or at least causing minor concern). We realised that these sheep are bright when we finally caught one (it took three of us and a good 20 minutes) and it immediately lies down and refuses to walk when a lead is placed around its neck.
They are a complete dead weight and fortunately Steph came along and lifted it and carried it up the road - one down 16 to go. We caughyt another two and managed to drag them up - at this rate it was going to take all week. Ali took charge and eased them out of the gate with our help - they immediately ran, not up the road, but into the Kale field which had fortunately been harvested. Kim opened the gate with Stuart acting as gatekeeper to keep Flora in (we had learned from the previous time). I crept around the pile of freshly uprooted hawthorn (to make way for fencing) wearing my sheepskin jumper and frightening them straight into the field. Gate closed job well done.

The Parable of the Prodigal Son is even more spooky. For those following the Tales of Alasdair the end result is that after being evicted from his 'shagpad' in 'The Mill' as Maxmill Park is known to the inmates and being forced into a 3 star hotel in Hawick he decided that enough was enough and it was time to 'ditch the bitch', or was it a case of vice versa, and come home. The parable runs like this, more or less following what happened -

And Jesus said "A certain man had two sons The younger demands his share of his inheritance while his father is still living, and goes off to a distant country where he 'wastes his substance with riotous living', and eventually has to take work as a swine herder. There he comes to his senses, and determines to return home and throw himself on his father's mercy. But when he returns home, his father greets him with open arms, and hardly gives him a chance to express his repentance; he kills a 'fatted calf' to celebrate his return. The older brother becomes jealous at the favored treatment of his faithless brother and upset at the lack of reward for his own faithfulness. And he said unto him, 'Son, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine. It was meet that we should make merry, and be glad: for this thy brother was dead, and is alive again; and was lost, and is found'".

Our fatted calf was slow roast Angus and we let off fireworks and drank lots of Sicilian wine and Stuart gets the TT when I get my R8. Ali was lost and is now found and has much cleaner hands, less fleas and a better diet.

I was amused to see that the gullible homeless department was rated 'Fair' in an appraisal (Unfair would be more appropriate in my opinion). However it was good to see that they finally evicted Alasdair and put into motion The Prodigal Son's return - even though we suggested that at the start. The interesting thing was the stories of Maxmill as a violent place at night, at schizophrenics breaking windows, of Alasdair being advised by a social worker to give up his job at Hume's and live off income support - fortunately Archie wasn't having any of that and played his pivotal role in convincing Alasdair that there is no place like home. Leave them alone and they will come home wagging their tails behind them - perhaps the Parable of the Lost Sheep and Prodigal Son are linked closely.

The Mediation Department wasn't going to actually give us any mediation as we were talking to our son, we offered to stop speaking to him. When he moved back home they parachuted in the dynamic duo of Jordan and James (mediation commandos), who were perfectly nice people and looked suitably shocked as we relayed our tale but we are hoping they can help in the repatriation of Alasdair (remember Iraq - the battle was easy it is the aftermath that is delicate and time consuming). The mediation process seems to make sense from my perspective and it will be interesting to see it working at this stage.

With a dead monkey bike, life and a new school life in Galashiels life is starting to return to normal - my rowing machine arrives soon and Ali and I are set to row to the Outer Hebrides next year (possibly from the Inner Hebrides). Kim and I will have to take him to the bus in Kelso everyday so it looks like swimming every day from now on which will be good practice for the Minch when the rowing boat sinks.

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